Inner Bad Girl Released!

It's Lady K's Birthday today! HAPPY BIRTHDAY LADY K!!!!

I took her out for dinner last night...well...to be clear...we went to The Sandbar and when the bill came for our FABULOUS meal (seriously...we both had delectable meals...she won on the dessert factor though...yummy bread pudding...my cheesecake was but a pale comparison...and that's only slightly ironic as I had white chocolate cheesecake) it was slightly higher than anticipated...so Lady K graciously paid for part of her Bday dinner. SEE HOW FABULOUS SHE IS?

Holy Shit the 9 O'clock gun just went off and scared the CRAP out of me!!! That thing was louder than usual tonight...must have been an extra dose of gun powder or perhaps the cloud cover makes the sound seem louder.

*ahem* Digression.

Anyhoooo....where was I? Oh yes..the WONDERFUL Lady K! She also gave me a great book called "The Bad Girl's Rate-A-Date Guide". This thing is FULL of useful advice and has several sections where you can pick apart your date with excruciatingly funny details. One of my favourites is "celebrity he "thinks" he most closely resembles....artist rendition below" and there is a space where you are to draw the "celebrity" Oh my.

First off...despite me saying that I wish I could draw nude men...I can't even draw stick men! Lady K once gave me these brilliant water colour post cards so that I could draw fabulous things on my world adventures and then mail them to her. I drew what I thought was a pretty good wooly aussie sheep and sent it to her. When I came home a year later the post card was proudly shown on Lady K's fridge and I was so excited to see it. She told me that she kept it there to amuse herself on a daily basis as the drawing was so bad. She even asked if I had ever SEEN a sheep. Oh sure I have seen sheep....I just can't draw the buggers! teehee

Ok...back to the Book. So....the title is pretty nifty....I'm particularly drawn to the "Bad Girl" bit. I think I have an inner bad girl...I believe she is about to come out of her hiding place. WATCH OUT WOLRD! ha!

When I was much younger I used to head out to the clubs armed with a passable if sometimes laughable, Irish accent. I called myself Evil Kwerkie on those nights. It worked really well with the fellas...nothing like a little bit of Foreign Factor to boost the ego. Still...it ended up backfiring in a bad way. I actually met a guy that I REALLY liked! That just sucks....you can't start anything off with a big lie like that. Ah well. His name was Sheldon..and as we all know...Sheldons of the world can do your taxes but they are not the stalions we wish they'd be in bed. (I learned that from "When Harry Met Sally" -pretty much one of my all-time fav. movies).

The digression in this post is amazing isn't it? Where am I off to next? Oh yes...back to the book.

I do believe that I will try to use this book on my next date. Not that I have a date set up any time soon or anything. I am going to give old Lava Life a bit of a break for now. I think I will lay low for a bit and then see what the Wine Tastings will do for my social life.

The nice thing about having an Inner Bad Girl and letting her out to play....is that it's not about dressing up in leather and taking the risk of being mistaken for an Outer Fetish Chicky....but that your Inner Bad Girl is simply an attitude adjustment. It's the raised eyebrow, the twinkle in my eye and the sly smile on my lips. Oh yes....the Inner Bad Girl is just DYING to be taken out on the town. Maybe next weekend...this weekend is Lady K's Birthday Party extravaganza! Bad Girl Kwerkie would just be wasted there...there is no one with whom I can be BGK with!

WoW....KGB - Kwerkie Gone Bad....mmmmwwwwahahahahahahha