The Winds of Change

Just when I thought that things were pretty bad between us...Ronan manages to confirm that in a whopping display of indifference.

I have been offered an opportunity to open my own office in Calgary...the catch is that this would all have to happen in the next few months. In fact...my boss has it in mind that he office be set up as early as mid October...just in time for my 31st Birthday and a huge trade show in Red Deer. That would be the perfect opportunity to really grab potential clients from our already huge client base in Alberta.

I didn't want to spoil Ronan's birthday with this news but it leaked out this morning on the drive into work. His reaction spoke more than any words. He's excited for me. Happy that I have this opportunity. But don't expect him to leave his good paying job to come with me. So that's it. He's completely willing to let me go.

Last month a job opportunity came up for him...in Calgary. He was thinking about it for a long time, got excited about it and has made no bones about wanting to move back to Calgary ASAP. He loves the Vancouver lifestyle but hates it's expense...the tax, the bad drivers etc etc. He complains CONSTANTLY about how expensive things are here and I admit that he seems to be pretty racist about the drivers here. He ended up not applying for the job as he realized that it was just the moving back to Calgary that got him excited about it and not the job itself.

Someone once told me that I should judge a man by his actions and not his words.

Last night Ronan told me that I meant the world to him. That he loves me more than anything. This morning we made mad passionate love to each other and all seemed well.

This morning with the news of my possible (and let's be clear here...nothing is written in stone and my boss can be rather fickle) move to Calgary his actions can only be described as indifferent.

If he does love me more than anything and I do mean the world to him...than the FIRST thing he should have said was that we'll work this out. That somehow we can figure something out. But instead he basically told me that he won't leave his good paying job here for nothing in Calgary and that as I can't support him he'll stay here.

What bothered me the most was that the news didn't even seem to upset him in any way. He was relaxed and neutral. How can I be the love of his life as he claims and he not be even moved in any way that I could be living 12hrs away.

Too bad I didn't wait until after his Birthday as I think that tomorrow's celebration will lack some level of fun. It will be hard for me to be all smiley knowing that it doesn't (or is it that I don't? ) matter to him all that much.