Ok...I know that I have been on the quiet side for a while now...well here I am....back from the abyss.
Things have been a bit on the turbulent side between Ronan and myself. I'm not sure how it happened...but I do know that it began the weekend of Corinna's wedding. I'm not sure what happened to be honest. Perhaps the honeymoon stage of our initial dating is over and now as we relax more and more into each other and our routine we seem to forget that wooing is still important.
I don't think I am too high maintenance as a girlfriend. I do know that I have a fairly high sex drive and I think that Ronan's is waning a bit. In fact...I know it is having spent the last week on vacation with him where we only fooled around 3 days out of 10. This is starting to concern me more and more. Despite me bringing this up with Ronan he feels that this is quite normal though he admits he misses the mornings when I would wake up and give him a blow job.
Well...I miss fooling around in general. I miss it when he used to reach out for me and kiss me madly and deeply. I miss him actually FOLLOWING through with his sexual banter or promises of later. Now it seems that all we do is complain about the lack of sex instead of actually having it.
How can this change if we both just talk and no one does anything? I try to initiate sex but am refused...so this makes me just not want to initiate it. Why bother wearing sexy lingerie or trying to tempt him if it is always met with "I'm tired." or "Wait until later".
Has he just lost interest in ME or sex in general?
His birthday is on Friday and I am he wants to keep things very low key. He doesn't want to celebrate with my family and in fact, doesn't want me telling anyone it's his birthday. I have no idea why that would be important to him to keep it a secret.
Last night I told him I felt sad. That I felt that I wanted this relationship more than he did. His response was that my statement hurt his feelings and that of course he wants to be with me etc etc. If this is true...I need him to show me. You know what they say...actions speak louder than words. Though on that note... I can't remember the last time he spontaneously told him he loved me - lately it's been a response to my words.
I miss the honeymoon and the kittens and puppies. How do I get them back?
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