So last night's ReLife discussion was all about Trust. The premise being that you don't need to earn people's trust but instead you need to choose to give it. And I got to thinking about who I trust and why and who I don't trust and why.
I am trying to figure out where it was along the way that I lost trust in my family but more importantly...in myself.
I am so afraid of making the WRONG decision that I just choose to NOT make decisions and rather than assertively going after what I want in life I just let life happen TO me.
Well...that has gotten me to where I am now, but it's not helping me to grow. I have decided to just let go and have more. I am going to let go of fear and I am going to embrace trust. Now I'm not talking about getting hosed on some ponzi scheme but rather I am deciding to use some healthy boundaries but to give a bit more trust out to the world.
For example! I was out on a date 2 weeks ago and things went well. I explained I was going to be away for a week for work and so we texted back and forth during that week and all was fine. Upon my return I text him and he didn't respond until today. So basically it took him 5 days to get back to me.
My first thought was to write him off.
However...after last night's meeting I have really thought about it...and I'm going to try to give out a bit of trust. The worst case is that nothing comes of this with Powell (yeah...I did it...I named him a weird sounding name!).
Sooo. We are happily texting back and forth today and have made plans for Sunday. I'm not worried about whether or not they happen...I'm just going to trust that something lovely will happen in some sort of form. Even if it's just that I spend a few hours with him and laugh at least twice. End of expectation.
That is mostly where a lot of my disappointments come from...I have these expectations and they are rarely ever met. I am just trying to figure out how to relieve myself of these expectations and stay in the moment and life in Real Life!
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