2 days before my 31st Birthday I had a young girl - probaby aged 17 or so - tell me (and I quote)
"You look so good for your age".
The words hung in the air and I sprouted 3 grey hairs as they clung there for dear life.
So good for my age?? Is she fucking kidding me?? I never thought *I* would be the one to say this but..."Kids these days!" Jayzus! I'm 31 I'm not 61!
I have fallen into a bit of a slump the 2 weeks before my birthday. I guess that I am feeling like I AM getting a bit old. I can actually start to hear my biological clock...it's not a nice sound. It used to be a polite "tick tick tick" in the back of my cerebral cortex...now it has moved it's way to the forefront of my brain with a slightly anoying "Tick tick tick".
It gets even louder when I see my nephews but especially when I hold them. Then its more like a phreaking BOOM than a tick. But once the little ones squirm too much or cry too loudly then the BOOM retreats into a fainly audible "psst psst psst".
Oh who knows...I waffle back and forth on the kid issue. Would I like them? Maybe with the right guy and definitely at the right time. Now is not that time...and if I'm 38 and still haven't found all the elements in place...then I guess I will get some puppies instead - at least they don't talk back!
I have begun to find new things in my life to foucs on. I still love my job and I am actually beginning to think more and more about how I can do more things in the office. I would really like to have more involvment with the advertisement and promotional stuff. Right now Simone does a lot of that sort of stuff and I get the impression from her that she doesn't enjoy it so much. Besides that...she's so phreakin' busy that she doesn't have time for it! So I'd love to learn and take that stuff over.
Also...I can see where this company can grow if we just changed a few of our "set" ideas. There was talk about doing up another Festival and I think that it would be a good time to set the ball in motion for that. I am actually looking at this as where I want to go wtih my CAREER not just how can I feel good about my JOB. There is a difference I think between a Career and a Job. I'd like the first option please.
I think these are signs of maturity. That's nice. I guess I had to start maturing at some time. 31 might be the magic number!
Ok...more another time.
Kwerkie.
1 comment:
Interesting thing about age. Me personally - I turned 35 the day after you turned 31 and I've come to the conclusion that although I might not be trim as I used to be and have more grey hair than I used too, I can honestly say without a doubt that if I had to give up what I know now about life to go back and be young again - fuck it. I'd rather be who I am today. Afterall - My 30's have been rather amazing in the scope of who I've met in my life. And I've come to clearly understand who I am now....... wouldn't change it for anything.
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